I've recently been conducting research for my book about OxyContin, and my subsequent treatment with Suboxone. This entails digging up books, and articles from medical journals, the Internet, and the library at the university near my home.

One of the documents I recently examined is 365 pages long and carries the ridiculous title, "Medication Assisted Treatment for Opioid Addiction in Opioid Treatment Programs: A Treatment Improvement Protocol." The document seeks to instruct doctors on how addicts should be handled when submitting themselves for treatment with Methadone or Suboxone.

As you might have already suspected, this document was written by the U.S. Government. It is published by an organization that is as complex as the silly title of the document. It is published by "The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration, Center for Substance Abuse Treatment, of the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services."

The document (which is really more of a book) describes how every doctor, in every clinic, should handle every junkie who comes through their door. A committee of no fewer than 20 names, each foll wed by M.D. or PhD, claim credit for writing this fun little paper. The document describes how dope fiends like me should be inspected, detected, injected, dejected, rejected, signed, sealed, delivered, and blah, blah, blah. I wonder how many of the people on the committee have ever been a patient at a an opioid treatment clinic (or whatever the hell they are calling it).

Here's what strikes me: When I went to see my doctor about Suboxone, he and I went into an exam room, shut the door, and talked about my drug problem. Together we created a plan that we hoped would work. It did. Now I'm done. We never once referred to the government's protocol for how I should be screened, tested, interrogated, etc. Like any other disease, my doctor and I decided how to treat it, and we did it without any help from the government.

I wouldn't recommend it, but for the curious, anyone can take a look at the government's silly book yourself. It's available in PDF format at http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/bv.fcgi?rid=hstat5.chapter.82676 .

Treating people like me is a big business. I wonder how many people the government employs to decide how my drug problem should be handled. I wonder how much that costs. Add all of those people to the thousands who work at public and private treatment centers, and you get the idea.

What would the world be like if everyone who had a drug problem could just go to a doctor and get treated like any other disease? I can hear those thousands of people in the "treatment industry" screaming that such a thing just isn't possible. But for them, I have some chilling, shocking news.

Someday they may be obsolete.

My shrink just came back from a conference where future methods of treatment were discussed. One of the items is what they are calling "Addiction Vaccination." That's right. By creating killed viruses that resemble, say an opioid molecule, and injecting it into your bloodstream, your body will develop antibodies to the opioid. Get vaccinated for Oxy, go out and snort an 80, and before you know it, your body thinks you are infected with a disease and sends out cells that eat the drug and eliminate it.

Yeah, o.k., so that's pretty futuristic, but it's going to happen. Why? Because the smart money is betting on treating my drug habit just like any other damn ailment that might befall me. Not to mention the fact that the drug companies who will develop this futuristic treatment have already figured out that the "treatment industry" is chock full of cash, making it a great place to take away some market share.

I can't wait to get my shot.

Suboxone Withdrawal: Licking the inside of a pill bottle

I had been off Suboxone for a week and a day. Feet like concrete blocks, dying for sleep, I wondered when it would end. Granted, withdrawal from Suboxone wasn't even as horrible as a full blown OxyContin detox, it was difficult nonetheless. On the 8th day, I reached into a recycle bin where I had saved several of those little brown prescription pill bottles that had once contained Suboxone, and I poked into each one with my finger, licking off a thin, barely visible coating of orange powder. The difference between withdrawal from Oxy and Suboxone is that Oxy is more debilitating, but you'll feel a little bit better each day. With Suboxone, you won't be lying in a pool of vomit shaking like a chihuahua, but you will feel tired, weak, and generally ill, but most of all you'll be left wondering, day after day, if it will ever get better.

It will.

There's one other really significant difference between withdrawal from the two drugs. When I was using Oxy, I can remember two serious withdrawal episodes, and although I did feel a little better after a few days, I was left with huge cravings. Each time I tried to get off Oxy, a few days later I would stumble and fall face first into a big powdery pile of OC. With Suboxone I felt lifeless for weeks on end, but I didn't feel the need to go get high. Not at all. The reason? My shrink says this: it's all about conditioning. After 18 months on Suboxone, my brain no longer connected the dots between Oxy and feeling bad (or good). Conditioning is, after all, what the whole program is all about.

It's not a whole hell of a lot different from Nicorette or Commit, the two nicotine substitutes for smokers. Take Commit instead of a smoke, you'll get the nicotine you need, and after a long enough period of time, your brain will forget to light up. Same thing with Suboxone.

I just wish it hadn't taken so long to feel better after quitting Suboxone. It's been 90 days. I am now feeling almost 100% back to normal. The upside? Methadone is a lot worse, or so they say. Best of all, I don't need no stinking Oxy. Game over.

What's next?

Love,

Gus

Will The Manufacturer of Oxy Feel the Pain?

Recently, the guys at Purdue Pharma admitted that Oxy was more addictive than they let on. So, they agreed to pay up. The money will be distributed to US state governments so that they'll have money to clean up the mess (i.e., pay for treatment programs, law enforcement, etc.).

The question though, is whether or not the Gods of Oxy will feel any pain as a result.

Russel Mokhiber has published an article entitled "Twenty Things You Should Know About Corporate Crime" (see point number 11) which gives one the impression that there's a kind of Oxy that can be prescribed to corporations, allowing them to continue to live their lives free of pain.

Reportedly, the Oxy Gods took a huge hit of this magic corporate dust that prevents corporate pain, just before agreeing to pay for their misdeeds. In many cases, corporations have more than one organizational structure, and may hold within the realm of their parent company, several 'corporate children' composed of holding companies, self-insurance companies, and other organizations that only exist on paper.

It looks like the Gods of Oxy may have merely sacrificed one of their corporate children rather than take the hit themselves. Evidently, corporate children are simply bastards. Any allusions to the story of Abraham should stop here.

The demise of the Oxy chieftains doesn't phase me. They'll scrape up a few hundred million to pay the price for the privilege of continuing to operate, the money will trickle to the states where it will buy bullet-proof vests for cops and pay the overtime for a receptionist at a poorly run state treatment program. Meanwhile, kids will still grind 'em and snort 'em, somebody will wake up in the morning lying next to a cold stiff body, and grandma's habit will intensify.

Nothing will change. No pain, no gain.

Love,

Gus

(heh heh heh...)

Fully Loaded?

One of Lindsay Lohan's most prominent movies is a film about a girl and her relationship with a car. The film is entitled "Fully Loaded." Lindsay just entered rehab for the second time this year after being photographed in the front seat of a car, allegedly passed-out, allegedly Fully Loaded on OxyContin.

I'm an old guy by comparison at age 46. Kicking Oxy was one of the most difficult things I've ever done, but fortunately I had some life-experience behind me. I can't imagine being 20 years-old and having to go through the same crap.

When I first kicked, I remember telling my shrink that Oxy made me feel so damn good that I was worried I might never feel that good again. The scary part is that my shrink agreed with me. He suggested that for the rest of my life, I might never find anything (basket weaving, Tai Chi, vodka, french fries, young interns, etc.) that would be as pleasurable as Oxy, so I'd better get over it. Damn. If that's true then at least I've got 26 more years of good times under my belt than that poor kid Lindsay will ever have. Maybe I'm more fortunate than I thought I was.

By the way, isn't it time we quit calling it "Hillbilly Heroin?" One of the headlines about Lindsay made a reference to her being hooked on "Hillbilly H." The truth is that Oxy is made from the same stuff as heroin. The truth is, despite all the advances we've made in medical science, our best shot at killing pain is the same alkaloid, from the same poppy plant that humans have been snorting, smoking, and shooting since the beginning of written history.

I feel sorry for the Lohan kid. Imagine that the highest high you'll ever know was when you were 20 years-old, and that that's as good as it gets?

Maybe there is some hidden joy in basket weaving after all. If there's joy somewhere (besides Oxy) I'll keep trying to find it.